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MY GUY: Oga Commissioner, how far na?
ME: I dey oh
MY GUY: Wetin dey work you na? This one wey you just sit down quietly like this, everything dey ok?
ME: Guy! See, e don red oh. As e be like this, I need the "original Palliative" wey dem dey share for we Nigeria oh
MY GUY: Ah! Wait, you mean sey the N30 Indomie wey dem dey share give us na fake? Aboy, clear my brain na
ME: Abobi, you dey sleep? You never observe sey the Coronavirus wey dey we country dey different from the one wey dey yonder? Our own na Covid-419, while their own na Covid-19.
MY GUY: Wait, that be sey our own senior their own oh. Chaii, we don die finish be that oh
ME: Sharrap! Olodo! See, nobody go die... You no dey see sey our own get swag? Some patients dey even take selfies wey dem dey chop noodles and fried egg for their beds, while some dey even post funny funny things from their quarantine centres. But for yonder, the videos and pictures wey we dey see fit make you wan commit suicide instead of the Coronavirus to kill you...
MY GUY: Na true oh... I bin see one post wey one girl post sef. But wait oh, what of the Original Palliative wey you bin mention?
ME: Make I yarn you... See, as e be like this, I dey look for the control of the person wey dey in charge of the Covid-419 Actors Association. I wan act too... My own go bloody! I don even arrange my own "I WENT, I FOUGHT AND I CONQUERED - I AM A COVID-19 SURVIVOR" story keep sef. E carry weight pass Dwayne Johnson
MY GUY: I never still understand you oh
ME: How you wan take understand me? Apart fromm Bole & Fish, wetin you dey feed your brain with? Abeg, shift jare, make I go that NCDC page check who dey win... Them for just collabo with BET9JA sef, make boys follow cash out